Welcome to "Sock Monkeys Who Look Like Misha!"

Fact: People close to Misha Collins report that he is warm and fuzzy.
Fact: Those same people report that he is also fond of tricks and pranks.

Conclusion 1: Misha is likely made of wool.
Conclusion 1b: ...And also monkeys.

I'm your host, Jared P. ...Join me as we delve into the mysterious connection between Misha Collins and his sock monkey army! (Submissions welcome.)
-JP

Proper Primate Pirates

Fact: As a youth, Misha spent many years at sea, hopping rides with tramp steamers.
Fact: One of his eyes -- the one looking at you right now, yes -- is made of Carnival glass.
Fact: The other eye is a cleverly fashioned button filched from Olivier "La Bouche" Levasseur's vest.

Conclusion 1: Misha is a pirate.
Conclusion 1b: ...made of wool and stuffing.
-JP

Are You an Angel or a Devil?

Fact: Misha's first acting job was a walk-on role in an ad for craft store giant Stuff 'n Stuff. He modelled a sock monkey hat and hot glue gun wings.
Fact: In payment, he received full craft service privileges, and a free crafting kit of his choice. There was no going back.

Conclusion 1: Half the sock monkeys globally created every year are knitted by Misha Collins.
Conclusion 1b: His cross-stitching skills have languished in the meantime.
-JP

Heroes of Our Time

Fact: Misha's alter ego is [REDACTED].
Fact: He has been known to [REDACTED] and [REDACTED] in service to the public, and has been awarded [CENSORED BY ORDER OF THE QUEEN OF ENGLAND].

Conclusion 1: Misha is a superhero.
Conclusion 1b. Everyone knows superheroes aren't entirely human.
-JP